When my two sons were little, I came across the book, "Boys! Shaping Ordinary Boys into Extraordinary Men", by Bill Beausay. Inside that little book, I learned that one best ways I could help my boys develop a solid sense of worth was by helping them develop mastery in some area of their life. Mastery, as Beausay defines it, is "a sense of accomplishment created by real skill … [It’s] spending time, exerting effort, and producing proof of excellence in an endeavor."

The concept of mastery made sense to me. So as a dad, I’ve sought to discover what my two son’s natural talents are and then committed myself to helping them develop those talents to the highest level possible. Brad pursues mastery in baseball. Adam is mastering the electric bass.

I believe life and faith mastery was what Jesus was trying to accomplish in the lives of 12 men he was training to carry on his mission. One of the vital skills Jesus knew these men and all of his followers for all time would need to possess was the ability to get over their life’s greatest errors.

Peter, the make-it-happen fisherman, one of three men in Jesus’ inner circle, is our model. It’s Peter’s up and down life’s story that shows us how to make a comeback after we’ve blown it big time. Peter had to learn to put his less than perfect performance behind him, so he could go on to play well in God’s big game of life and faith.

When it comes to dealing with our life’s greatest errors, three scenes from Peter’s life show us what it takes to master our mistakes. In scene one from Peter’s life, we find Jesus trying to explain to his disciples why he must soon face death. Jesus attempts to explain that part of God’s plan and his life’s mission is to give his life as a sin-sacrifice for people like us. Jesus tells them, "This is the very reason I came" into the world.

As Jesus tries to explain how all this will come about, Peter can’t take it. Out of his deep devotion to Jesus and his passionate personality he says, "I am ready to die for you." (John 13:37) Peter declares he’ll go to the death for Jesus, Jesus predicts Peter will go runnin’. Jesus’ words are: "Die for me? No, before the rooster crows tomorrow morning, you will deny three times that you even know me." (John 13:38)

Peter does deny knowing Jesus three times; and he is devastated. I don’t think he was lying to Jesus when he promised to never forsake him. I believe he was absolutely convinced he could take the heat, convinced he could resist any temptation to bail on Jesus. But he was wrong, three times wrong.

That story reminds me too well of my own life and promises I’ve made to God and then broken. It reminds me of times when I felt deeply committed to following Jesus then folded when the pressure came.

Every time I’ve done less than what I’d promised myself and God, I’ve felt the shame and the guilt that failure to live up to my promises brings. I know God is a God of grace and mercy, but I also know that facing my faults and failures is always a painful process. Still, the No.1 skill when it comes to mastering our mistakes is this: The ability to face our own thoughts and failures.

That’s why the next scene of Peter’s life is not only a "must see" for every person who has made Jesus their forgiver and their life’s leader, it’s a biblical scene we need to bookmark and go back to any time our personal weaknesses get the best of us.

To get that scene, we have to fast-forward through some significant events. Jesus has been crucified and placed in a cave-like grave. Three days later, reports surfaced that a handful of His closest followers had seen Him alive and talked with him. This was followed by two appearances by Jesus to His followers.

Despite all the bold promises, Peter has denied Jesus. Peter has gone from thinking he was the strongest and most committed of Jesus’ followers to thinking he is the worst and most worthless of the bunch. A few days later, Peter and some of the other disciples go out fishing. They realize that Jesus is on the beach. Peter jumps out of the boat, swims ashore, and has a conversation with Jesus that goes something like this:

Peter was grieved that Jesus asked the question a third time. He said, "Lord, you know everything. You know I love you." (John 21:15-17 portions removed)

Jesus was working a plan to get Peter back in the game. Jesus is working to restore Peter’s faith and confidence. He’s trying to convince this broken man that despite the fact that he pulled off a trifecta of personal failures, Jesus still wants and needs him on his team.

The first lesson in learning to master our mistakes is obvious. We all need to face our failures for what they are. Jesus made Peter do that three times. To master our mistakes, we first have to admit we have them. Denial gets us nowhere. Just getting down or depressed solves nothing, getting all bent out of shape, attacking ourselves or others, because inside we feel like a failure, doesn’t resolve a thing.

Peter needed to discover that his greatest sin wasn’t that he lost courage; his greatest sin was that he thought he couldn’t fall. His biggest fault wasn’t weakness, but thinking that he was stronger than he really was. It was Peter’s pride that had to be purged, or he would forever be vulnerable to failures like this. So Jesus makes him, face his pride, the culprit that led him to his most humiliating failure ever.

Jesus also addressed all the doubts and confusion that Peter’s failure created within him about who he really was and what he really was. By forcing Peter to admit, three times, that he still loved Jesus, Jesus was helping Peter see that in his heart he was STILL a person deeply committed to Jesus, but a person who needed more help than he ever imagined fleshing that out.

We won’t ever move beyond our mistakes until we face our momentary failures in light of our deeper commitments. If being deeply committed to Jesus is who we really are, then any sin or failure is an aberration that we first must honestly face, but to move ahead we next need to look beyond our bad decisions or actions to what’s deep in our hearts. Looking beyond our behavior into our hearts helps us understand that we may have lost our way, but we have not lost our true desire to follow Jesus. Instead of being stuck in despair, Jesus calls us to renew our commitment, to reaffirm our love and be restored.

Who or what have you always wanted to be? Have you faced failures in pursuit of your dreams? Is that dream still deep in your heart? God has the ability to help you get there, but you’ll have to face up to the inner forces and failures that have kept you from fulfilling your dreams and mastering your mistakes.

Over the years as I’ve tried to help people move beyond their mistakes, I’ve often told people, "God is always more interested in your present and future than your past." That idea is what I think Jesus was trying to get Peter to realize and what we can learn next.

Just getting Peter to admit he failed or had way overestimated his spiritual strength was only step one in Jesus’ recovery program. Step two is to have the ability to focus on the future.

I intentionally left three statements out of the conversation Jesus and Peter had. Jesus wove a future-focus into this face-the-facts recovery program. Each of the three times, Jesus forced Peter to reaffirm his love and commitment, Jesus immediately gave Peter a glimpse or vision of his future. It went something like this: "Do you love me, Peter?"

"Yes, Lord I love you."

"You do? Then …feed my lambs. You love me? Then take care of my lambs. You are sure you love me? Then feed my sheep."

Jesus spelled out a very specific course for Peter’s future. But what about us? How or where do we go to find a vision for our future that can get us beyond focusing on our past?

Before my son Brad pitches, I tell him, "One batter at a time, one pitch at a time." It means, "Keep your focus on what your job is RIGHT NOW. Don’t worry about the last batter or the last pitch."

I think that’s what Jesus wanted Peter to do and what he would want us to do to get our lives back on track after we’ve had a relational or spiritual set back. To get our lives going again when we’ve done something that has us questioning our worth or our place in God’s work, we need to ask ourselves, "What’s my job here, what role am I in?"

Scripture is full of roles God has set out for people who want to live like Jesus. The Bible calls us to be faithful spouses, positive parents, dependable employees, supportive friends, and people of character; honest, fair and trustworthy. The list goes on. Find a role that fits where your life is RIGHT NOW, and with God’s help, humbly move toward living out that role God’s way.

God has a future full of possibilities for all of us. But if we try to get there in our own strength, we’ll end up where Peter did, crushed and broken by our own weaknesses. But we don’t have to do life on our own, God offers all of us not only the opportunity to make Jesus the forgiver and leader of our lives, he offers us the help and strength of his Spirit, who fills us with the ability to grow and change beyond the limits of our mere human potential. Like Peter, Jesus knows that we aren’t as strong as we think we are. He knows we will have our share of bad decisions and choices. The question is, "Will we pursue the better future and better way God is holding out to us?

We show we have mastered our mistakes when they no longer have power over us. That happens as we are able to build on our brokenness. Peter became the leader of all the followers of Jesus in that day.

What I find most encouraging are words Peter wrote 60 years after his greatest failure. They show that the once proud man had fully faced his faults and weaknesses and could, without fear of being mocked or ridiculed, write about the danger of pride and the need for humility. Listen to what he wrote:

So humble yourselves under the mighty power of God, and in his good time he will honor you. Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about what happens to you. Be careful! Watch out for attacks from the Devil, your great enemy. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for some victim to devour. Take a firm stand against him, and be strong in your faith. (1 Peter 5:5-9)

Peter learned his lessons well. He grew into and fulfilled his God-given role. He shepherded and cared for God’s sheep successfully for many years. He is a big reason why we are here today still learning about Jesus and the new life he offers us.

Many of the greatest lives ever lived were created by God out of broken dreams and broken hearts. Once proud men and women whose pride and self-sufficiency is shattered by their lives’ greatest failures go humbly to God and find that His love never fails and his mercy never ends.

If mastery is a sense of accomplishment created by real skill, and if it includes spending time and effort to produce proof of excellence in some area of life, my prayer is that we will do the hard work of facing our failures, finding a focus for our future and building a new life on our brokenness. If we do those things, we WILL master our mistakes and move up into a higher level of faith and life.